I always find this time of year difficult for so many reasons. It's dark, cold and depressing for a start, but there is also all this pressure to improve yourself and better yourself. I think I need to try and learn to be happier with who I am and also to focus on the here and now and not on the future too much.
Taken a couple of days off work to re-evaluate and take stock. Being a Mum doesn't leave me much time to do this and in order to stay sane I really need it. Things have been getting on top of me and I really needed a break. I'm already nearly through the first day and I haven't really done very much at all. Trying not to feel guilty - a bad habit of mine. The washing up is still not done and the million things I was going to try and get done are still on my to do list, unticked. Still I have got things a little more in perspective now. I have a nasty habit of looking to far ahead and worrying and thinking too much. I have refocused my mind just on the next couple of weeks and what I want to achieve in that time. I like to set goals for myself. It helps focus my mind on something so that it doesn't get too full of loads of other stuff. I have to make them really achievable, like I gave up smoking last year and one of my goals is to keep off the fags. My head just seems programmed to feel guilty and negative towards myself. I unconsciously set myself very high standards and when I don't live up to these I feel like I've failed. When I look at what I'm thinking and realise what I'm doing though it really helps.
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4 comments:
I'm just planning on not planning too much(if it makes sense at all). I think that i'll just let it all flow and however things turn out i'll know that there wasn't alot of pressure on me, also that i enjoyed getting to the next step. For me excessive pressure on myself means that i do exactly the opposite to what i was supposed to do. RELAX!
hya,
ditto, it can be a bit of a lul after xmas.
the new year can be a good excuse to kick start making positive changes in your life & stuff. but it can also be quite a pressure 2 think ya should be making such life changing decisions, at the same.
think focusing on the here and now can be really useful in making bad times pass faster & at the same time can let you enjoy good times unaffected by the past or future.
i can be gulilty of over thinking things 2. i've learned to make loads a plans n keep on the go if i can, in the hope that i forget to think, if ya no wot i mean!
then sometimes if i'm lucky what ever seemed so important has been replaced by something else. & so on.
sometimes the smallest things take the greatest of effort to do but often get no recognition.
keep on keepin on sarah,
purkul
x
Knowing that the way you're thinking affects how you feel, is a really important step in breaking the viscious circle. The really difficult bit is catching the thoughts that make you feel bad and challenging them. Someone told me to look for evidence to see if they're reasonable.
I was speaking to a very inspiring woman yesterday. SHe has a blog on here too and she was explaining how she does it. She was saying that after a lot of practise she can identify the thoughts that cause her to go downhill. 95% of the time she can stop them by replacing them with a positive thought. This is difficult knack to master but she was saying that after a while she was able to do it.
I'm not sure where you're based Sarah Naomi, but in Stoke On Trent, there is an organisation called Changes. They offer support groups for people experiencing mental distress. I've found them really helpful in the past. They also have a web site with forums that offer support and advice on-line - their address is: www.changes.org.uk
keep posting - we're thinking of you.
Thanks for these two very honest posts - and yes this is a place to say what you mean - I have been able to say things on my blog that I would find difficult to say under ordinary circumstances - and I often feel a great sense of relief having written them down - I hope you get some of that sense of relief from blogging.
Welcome to the MB community - Tone
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